drwex (drwex) wrote,

Grieving is over, grief is not

Since I can't seem to sleep I might as well write an update. tl;dr I'm doing mostly OK. Insomnia is the big thing kicking my ass right now. I don't seem to feel tired when I ought to and I wake up way too early. There doesn't seem to be a specific or even identifiable cause. I'm not having recurring dreams or even specific stresses.

We ended formal shiva last Friday at sundown. We were able to make minyan happen Saturday night and then again Sunday so I could say kaddish. I really appreciate the people who came out to make that happen for me. Special thanks to minkrose the unicorn UU child of UU parents (ETA: see comment below) who served as transport to two folk who made part of Thursday's minya, and to surrealestate and family who made it despite wrangling two energetic and not-always-cooperative young ones. Another special thanks to dpolicar and earthling177 who brought us dinner and their pleasant company on Wednesday.

Generally, thanks to everyone who dropped by and brought things, helped with set-up/clean-up, and stayed to chat.

There's been no real progress with my mom's estate, but that's to be expected. I'm still planning to scatter ashes on May Day weekend.

I've been doing a pretty good job of keeping up the public face, particularly at work, which is ramping up a big new delivery cycle while the design team is still down 2 people, and I'm going to be carrying a huge load. I was in the office for three days that were almost entirely back-to-back-to-back meetings. That has been draining me of what little social energy I've had. I may continue to avoid group social things until I feel more stable though I really can't avoid having my parents visit for Seder. Normally Passover is my favorite holiday of the yearly cycle but right now I'm not feeling it.

On the other hand, it's sunny and in the 70s where I am. Having the sun on my skin has been a real mood lightener.
Tags: update
  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.