Alyssa Rosenberg defends the character and treatment of Black Widow. I think she's too generous in the credit she gives Marvel/Disney/Wheadon but her interpretation is relatively close to mine. Particularly, she reads the Loki/Black Widow scene in Avengers I the way I (now) read it. Her argument is that Natasha "...wasn't around the people who deserved to see..." her other side.
What's missing from this article, though, is any acknowledgement of the awful slut-shaming that cast members have thrown at Natasha's character, and the tepid response to it from officials at the franchise. I think that has affected peoples' interpretations of what happens on-screen.
Like me, Rosenberg seems to have a mental image of how the character is thinking and feeling that isn't all that widely shared. Any (good) piece of media has room for multiple interpretations and ways of reading - I don't expect official pronouncements from anyone at Marvel or Disney to settle the debate. But I do think it's incumbent on them to address the issues of (lack of) representation outside the movie as I expect the upcoming releases to further develop her on-screen character.
And I still want my Black Widow movies. As ricevermicelli mentioned in comments on prior post, the flashbacks we get through Scarlet Witch's manipulations open up a lot of questions that could be fruitfully mined. I lay a fair chunk of blame here at Joss Whedon's feet because he's a golden boy at the moment. Hollywood goes where the money is and he's proven he can make a gazillion bucks for them. If he said "I want there to be a Black Widow" movie you can bet people would be lining up to write him checks for it.