drwex (drwex) wrote,

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Gratitude is complicated


Interesting item on NPR I read over vacation. We're all supposed to be grateful, even in the face of the shitstorm that was 2016 and the incoming wave of racism, sexism, *phobia, and isolationist militarization that we brought upon ourselves. Yay.

Still, we each have things to be grateful for. Many of us have families and loved ones we would not willingly give up. Babies were born and people got together this past year in relationships that will improve and enrich them. This month is a commercialized pit but it's also nice to get and give meaningful gifts. Donations are also meaningful; I made some in honor and memory, and a couple were made in my name that I'm happy about.

So why isn't gratitude a thing for me? From the article: "People who score higher on measures of autonomy experience less overall gratitude and value it less" Hunh, maybe that's so.

"people who are uncomfortable with gratitude and with receiving gifts may be undermining their interpersonal relationships." - yep, that's a thing for sure. It took me a lot of years to master the simple idea of saying "thank you" meaningfully, and without any need to embellish or elaborate.

I am not (I hope) ungrateful. But like a lot of other social practices that people around me seem to find natural, I generally don't get a lot out of gratitude practices. As the article points out, there are many ways to skin a cat and these particular practices are likely better for some people than for others.

I don't have any grand conclusions past "it's complicated." Just more thinking going on.

Cross-posted from Dreamwidth, at http://drwex.dreamwidth.org/937567.html. You can comment here or there.
Tags: thinky stuff
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